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Top 17 things likely to be overheard if you have a Klingon on your software development team
- "This code is a piece of crap! You have no honor!"
- "A TRUE Klingon warrior does not comment his code!"
- "By filing this bug you have questioned my family honor. Prepare to die!"
- "You question the worthiness of my Code?! I should kill you where you stand!"
- "Our competitors are without honor!"
- "Perhaps it IS a good day to Die! I say we ship it!"
- "My program has just dumped Stova Core!"
- "Behold, the keyboard of Kalis! The greatest Klingon code warrior that ever lived!"
- "Specifications are for the weak and timid!"
- "This machine is a piece of GAGH! I need dual Pentium processors if I am to do battle with this code!"
- "You cannot really appreciate Dilbert until you've read it in the original Klingon."
- "Indentation?! — I will show you how to indent when I indent your skull!"
- "What is this talk of 'release'? Klingons do not make software 'releases.' Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of designers and quality assurance people in its wake."
- "Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak."
- "I have challenged the entire quality assurance team to a bat'leth contest. They will not concern us again."
- "Our users will know fear and cower before our software. Ship it! Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!"
- "My function calls do not have 'parameters' — they have 'arguments' — and they ALWAYS win them."