1. A pizza gets to our house faster than an ambulance.

A businessman was interviewing applicants for the position of divisional manager. He devised a simple test to select the most suitable person for the job. He asked each applicant the question, "What is two and two?"

Here is a stress management technique recommended in all the latest Psychological texts.

A Scoutmaster was teaching his Boy Scouts about survival in the Alaskan wilderness. "What are the three most important things you should bring with you in case you get lost alone in the woods?" he asked.

Several hands went up, and many important things were mentioned, such as water, matches, etc. Then one little boy in the back eagerly raised his hand.

It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news. Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community . . .